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Advice for New Swinging Couples Near Me

How new swinging couples avoid the common mistakes: talking first, profiles, limits and feelings.

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Looking for swinging advice? If you're new to swinging and want a bit of guidance, we can help you avoid the common mistakes.

This page is for swingers joining the scene for the first time. Swingers welcome new people, and we want to make sure you don't run into the problems that sometimes trip up newer couples. Much of it applies to singles too, though singles only have themselves to consider!

Thanks to the internet, it's never been easier to meet other swinging couples, but make sure you're joining for the right reasons. We don't want to put you off, just to help you start well.

Four things new couples get wrong

Don't push your partner into swinging. It may sound obvious, but pushing a partner onto the scene is asking for trouble. Talk about why you want to try it, and if you're not both fully happy, don't join. Swinging can turn your fantasies into reality, but dragging a reluctant partner along is a high risk to your relationship.

Take your profile seriously. This is where so many new swingers fall at the first hurdle, throwing up a profile with little thought. Read other members' profiles to get a feel for them, then spend time on yours: a well-written profile gets far more replies.

Agree your limits. This is a big one, and something to put in your ad too. Talk about how far you're both happy to go: would you be happy to watch your partner have sex with someone else? If not, start with soft swinging until you're more confident. Work out your limits in advance, not when you're sitting in someone's house or at a party.

Don't fall for the swingers you meet. Remember why you're swinging: for sex, nothing else. Some members build friendships, and that's great, but never fall for another swinger or tell them you have feelings for them: that isn't why they're there.

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These may seem obvious, but you'd be amazed how many people overlook them. As long as you talk everything through with your partner, you'll have a great time. Next, read the guide for new swingers and the rules and etiquette.

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Advice for new swingers: your questions

How do we know we're ready to swing?

When you've both talked it through, both want to try it, and you've agreed your limits in advance.

Should we start with soft swinging?

If either of you isn't sure about watching the other have sex, soft swinging is a good way to start.

What if one of us develops feelings?

Talk about it straight away. Swinging is about sex, not relationships, so take a break if either of you is unsure.

Is it free to join?

Yes. Joining is free: you can browse profiles, post your ad and photos, get daily match suggestions and send a limited number of messages a day. VIP adds unlimited messaging, advanced search and the chat rooms. You must be 18 or over.